Found this little gem on tumblr earlier. I rather like it.
I’m not sure if I should take this as a compliment or an insult.How is tumblr being like River?
The North Pole is great but yes, I think it’s time to leave. I made you a gingerbread TARDIS last night!
My night at the North Pole has been great.
I trust the Doctor, Jack and Romana to get Ianto back safely. The Masters and the Rani seem to enjoy the conflict more than anything else.
Don’t worry! I’m with Santa right now and I can assure you, he is most certainly not dead.
But about your anon…I’ve heard these gifs are often a suitable response on the tumblr planet.

Weeell. The Doctor took me to the North Pole to prove Santa exists. While we were there, the Rani kidnapped Ianto and took him to the Valiant. The Doctor hopped in the TARDIS and went to save him. That’s really all I’ve heard. I’m still making presents with Santa and the elves.
Obviously not. We’ve found so many people here now! There are at least 3 regenerations of the Doctor, a few of the Master, the Rani, some companions, Torchwood, and now you!
I’ve been so busy with Santa and the elves I’ve not had a chance to look. (I should probably sort out my priorities…)
Everything is going swimmingly, no need to worry.
*sigh* If only he’d listen once in a while and stop being such a stubborn Welshman he wouldn’t be in this mess.
Anyway, while I’m here I’m making everyone presents! Santa says I’m getting quite good at it. What The Masters and The Rani get will depend on Ianto’s safe return. Santa has agreed to give you coal otherwise. It’s probably what you deserve anyway.